Confession Letters

Surrendering Is Not A Battle Of The Wills, It’s An Act Of Worship

If 2016 is going to be a year of fulfillment and implementation [of God’s promises], then God must be in full swing. My heart is so full of hope, joy, and excitement, I can hardly contain myself. My heart is also filled with what Holy Spirit is filling it with – my future. In my spirit, I feel the next 11 months are going to be filled with opportunities to travel to specific places and minister, opportunities to lead worship, opportunities to grow in what God has called me to do in leadership, opportunities to step out further than I ever have in faith. I believe the favor I prayed for last year is the pavement I will walk upon this year.

This insight comes after a breakdown with Jesus and me. The Getchell schedule is very busy – and my flesh is very selfish. It doesn’t matter how giving of a person you are, everyone has something they don’t want to give up. I have mine. When you feel like that one thing that is “yours” is being infringed upon, naturally we begin to become defensive [or full of attitude, pride]. I feel like I give a lot of myself to others, to church, to work, to my family. I cannot tell you how many times I have these great ideas that will be accomplished in the evenings when I get home from work [or on a weekend] only they are met with dinner, baths, showers, laundry, rehearsal, prayer time, house cleaning, and prepping for the next day. The things I yearn to complete for myself never quite make it on the list. Then you feel Holy Spirit prompting you to give up yet another part of you. The only part you feel like you have left that is “yours” or “your time”. I fought it. I admit it, I was selfish in that moment [weeks]. Throughout my weeks of being selfish I felt like I wasn’t hearing from God. It was difficult for me to get into His presence. Normally it wasn’t. It was not until I had a conversation with my dear mother that I realized just how selfish I was being. Let me give you a visual… We are sitting at Dunkin Donuts having breakfast with my little girl. By the end of this conversation I am so full of internal frustration water works are happening. You can imagine what others were thinking around me. “Did someone die?” “Oh poor lady…” “She looks nuts!” And all the while, my daughter keeps asking, “mommy, why are you crying?”. How do I explain to a 3-year old that God just gave mommy a 2×4 across the head and I am crying because it hurts and I feel like I let Him down? (Sidenote: The devil is good at disguising things. He wants us to be prideful, manipulative, complainers that only think of ourselves. Do you really want to give him satisfaction?)

We went to church and in the midst of worship I found myself debating and arguing with myself mentally. Thinking about something I needed to do and then convincing myself why I don’t want to. If someone could be in my head watching I would appear to have multiple personalities. Becoming overwhelmed with my own thoughts, I fell to my knees and poured my heart out to God.

I surrendered.

2 Corinthians 3:17 Now the Lord is the Spirit,
and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.

After all, it’s not a secret to Him. He knows exactly what I am thinking at all times. I know scripture well enough to know that God wins all the time. I would not allow the devil to win the battle happening in my mind. I overcame my flesh, and told God I would do whatever He wanted me to do, including give up the only thing I had that felt like “me time”.

No sooner did the words come out of my mouth… I mean I am talking seconds… I felt a hand on my lower back. Prayers, in a language only described as angelic, began to pour out of this person’s mouth. My body swelled up with God’s presence – my eyes swelled with tears. The Lord spoke through this person and as I heard each and every word God had for me, I was overcome with more surrender. Surrender I didn’t even know I had in me. By the end of God speaking, all but one question I had asked God within the 21 day fast so far had been answered and accounted for. His last statement to me? “My good and faithful servant.” This single line put me over the top. I’m talking 100%, snotting out of the nose, forehead to the carpet, uncontrollable whaling. The people the chairs in front of me could probably hear me over the music.

I surrendered. God spoke.

Let me say, I don’t apologize for my moment with God. Our moments should never intentionally interrupt someone else’s worship – but sometimes when you are touched… you are just touched. My desire is for everyone I know to find their own, personal, unbridled freedom in worship to our Savior. When you can find your way to that place, there is no turning back. In those moments, you realize [or remember] what Jesus has brought you out of [your past sin] and placed you in [eternal life with Him, never lacking again]. Who wouldn’t be excited about that?!

Explaining God In Tupperware

To me, there is nothing better than when someone comes up with an easy way to understand something complicated. Our triune God, and how we fit into the mix, has not always been the easiest thing for me to really grasp. I mean, really grasp. The concept, I understand, but often times I find people looking at me like a deer in headlights when trying to explain it. Yesterday, I ran across this gem. Of all things, the example is fused with TUPPERWARE! David Platt does an excellent job of explaining how the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit work for us and in us. I hope you will take 10 minutes and watch this video. You won’t be disappointed! Enjoy!

Video link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y0w7QUMoRXA

For more on David Platt: http://www.radical.net/about-david-platt
For more on his resources: http://www.radical.net/resources

A Year of Fulfillment & Implementation

In 2015, I participated in my very first 21 day fast. I thought about what I wanted to pray about for the year – I wanted favor everywhere I went and in everything I did. Holy Spirit told me how exactly to participate in the fast. I obeyed. The outcome was astonishing; however, looking back a year later the outcome has floored me.

My instructions were different for the 1st day compared to the remainder of the fast. Within 21 days the Lord spoke 20 times to me. Yes, I went back and counted in my journal :). Some of the things He said were things I didn’t understand in the moment. Other things were answers to immediate situations (and what I didn’t recognize until later those same answers ended up applying to future situations as well.) I journaled all of it. Every single word.

Of all the things He said to me, one statement overwhelmed me with more emotion than any of the others.

You see, I have always had a secret prayer. When I died, I wanted God to have considered me so full of faith I could be in the “Hall of Faith”. (For those of you who may not know what I am referring to, it’s Hebrews 11.) For years I had secretly desired this and for God to see my faith. I wanted God to consider me faithful. I wanted people to be able to stand and speak at my funeral saying, “If Jade had anything, she had faith.” On the third day of my fast he spoke to me:

“You are my child of faith.”

Uh! Wow. If I hadn’t received anything else through the 21 days, that was worth it. To hear those words – words I had been praying to hear for years. Remember when I said the things He spoke in the current situations were also for future situations? This was one of them. It’s crazy how we think a situation is so helpless or overwhelming but once we are through it – we look back and it is never as big as we had once thought. Then we turn back around and standing in front of us is a mountain larger than the previous one. Little did I know, the situation that had God calling me His child of faith, was more like a mountain range. The big picture was I needed to get from one side of the mountain range to the other. The only way to do it – was go through it. (Read “It’s Your Trial. Guilt? Or Innocent?” and “Breaking Through The Mountain” when you have time.) Like a mountain, going up represent struggles and then coming down represents things seemingly getting better. Oh! There’s another mountain. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

The things I discovered while fasting ranged from answers to previous prayers, things I was curious of but never actually asked, direction for the future, and just being loved on by God. How often we really do yearn to be loved on by God whether we admit to it or not. That stands for male and female!

I encourage you to embrace the challenge of the 2016 twenty-one day fast. If you have not already, join in. Once you begin, I bet you go past the “official” end date and finish your own twenty-one day fast. In December, I began asking God what should I pray for the year 2016? He answered: fulfillment, action, and implementation. The promises and dreams He has given me in years past all happen this year. I’m so ready. In the months to come, I will share some of the things God spoke to me within the 2015 year with you. My only intention of doing this is to be as transparent as I can be so you can see God’s power and ability. I want you to see how much God loves us. To do so, I open up my heart and leave it out for strangers to devour if they so choose to do so. I am okay with that – because for every ten that devour my heart, one is helped in the process.

Dream. Believe. Achieve.

He Knows Me So Well

Around a month ago, the Lord spoke to me that I would be in a storm. When I looked around, I would be able to see nothing in every direction ; however, it would be calm. This would mean I was in the eye of the storm. When this moment came, He instructed me to “be still”. Oh, He knows me so well. 😉

For some reason whenever God speaks “storm” I imagine this rough, dark, time that seems like it is impossible to get through. In a hurricane, the eye of the storm is calm. Some have actually said it’s beautiful. There are still clouds all around though. This week, I have come to a place where I can’t see around me. I have hit the eye of a storm. Every aspect of my life seems blurry – and without purpose. Allow me to break it down for you:

Work – working my 8-5 job… but what am I striving towards?
Church – recently, the Lord told me to give up some scheduling that I did for our worship team… how can I help if He had me lay this down?
Hobbies – my current hobby is crossfit but I have had a hurt knee for a few weeks… how can I work towards my goals?
Home – all of a sudden, it feels like I am working two full-time jobs with wife/home duties… how will I ever stay on top of things?
Me – frustrated with myself and some things that aren’t changing… how will things improve when I am giving my best and it’s still not enough?

“Be still, and know that I am God…” – Psalm 46:10

When I would hit this moment in the past, I would work to find SOMETHING to do. My personality type likes to feel accomplished in things (I love short-term projects). It’s kind of like an addiction I guess you could say. I love the feeling of accomplishment; but God knows me so well, He instructed me to be still. He literally gave me instructions because He knew what I would do. This just makes me laugh. I imagine me sitting on His knee with Him talking to me like the dad He is. 🙂

In being still – and listening for what He has to tell me – I have heard:

1. Just serve
2. Rest and enjoy this time

He is giving me a season of rest, I believe, because the season to come is going to fast-paced and busy. He is SUCH a good GOD that He prepares me for what is to come. I have experienced more and more of this foreknowledge the deeper my relationship with Him has grown.

He tells us things for a reason, we just have to be willing to listen. I encourage you to do whatever He tells you to do because He has a reason behind it. I am excited for the things to come!! He has given me a snapshot of it and I am siked!!! Dreams really do come true when they are for Him and His Kingdom.

#daretodream #dreambelieveachieve