Operation Genesis Pt 1

If I were in the military and my general told me to do something it would be considered a direct order. If I didn’t do it, there would surely be consequences. Well my general (Jesus) has given me specific direct orders and I am having to do everything in my power for these things to come to fruition. But in war – there is an enemy too. An enemy who is doing everything they can to keep me from fulfilling my direct orders…

The past year (looking back) has been a battle. It hasn’t been til recently that I have been able to put two and two together and really understand what it is I’m seeing. The enemy has tried to get to me and tear me down in so many different avenues. In the beginning it took me a while to work through the battle because what I was really dealing with was not quite clear. I battled a series of allergy problems that caused me to not be able to sing for almost 6 months. (To those who know me – this is a huge to do for me!) Allergies that kept me in constant pain in my ears, swollen throat, hoarse – but every time I would go to the doctor they said, “We don’t understand because everything looks fine.” Once I was able to push through this trial, I was hit in the area of friendship. A friendship had been slowly building between a certain person and I – but thoughts of jealousy, negativity, the skewing of perception, anger, bitterness and many other feelings drove me insane (not literally) to the point I had to just sit down with her and spill it all out. This second trial was finally worked through – and now today – a friendship more precious than silver and gold is forming along with the use of our talents together hopefully in the near future. The third trial was the enemy trying to place himself in my marriage. Fighting and arguing soon followed but this was quickly nipped in the bud after a week or two. Not nearly as long as the previous two trials. After the attempt at my marriage came getting in my head with my past eating disorder. I had a day of feeling horrible about myself, wanted to go work out, not eat, blah blah…Nipped it. After this fourth trial came work. I became irritable at work, always in a bad mood, didn’t want to give good effort at work, blah blah… Nipped it. Then came the fifth trial. Showing up to church yesterday morning, I was hit with a handful of news and a creatively blocked rehearsal time (for me)  with my drama team. The enemy was really working over time to get his way – but he can’t have his way when God is having HIS way…

Through great trial comes great victory. I have victory regardless through the Lord – but it’s always nice to see it in front of you too! (lol) My vision from the Lord continues on and so will the trials. And they will get harder. And harder. And harder. But if you want something as badly as I want the desires of my heart – usually – you are willing to fight for it. I’m just blessed to have God fighting on behalf of me. It’s like fighting a front line battle from the back line sometimes. Other times, it’s feeling like I’m on the front line but God is my shield and sword. It’s pretty awesome…

1 PETER 5:7
7 Casting the whole of your care — all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all — on Him;
for He cares for you affectionately, and cares about you watchfully.

PHILIPPIANS 4:6-7
6 Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.